Suddenly , I feel that i need to pen my thoughts over here in my blog which has been rusty for a F**king long time . Maybe its the emptiness inside of me that urges me to find someone or something whom or which i can confide in .. I guess over here its the best place because i hardly share my problems with pple unless its fangy or mq (although hes such an asshole at times to mock at me but its ok on account that i've alreadi known him to be an asshole for such a long time). Suddenly i feel very emo recently i don noe y , according to mr lamb chops perhaps its the monday blues that is haunting mi hence my moody mood zzzz . Well , i don noe y but its like i come uni i have toned down super alot in terms of enthusiasm in alot of tings and it seems that this is affecting my social life. I tink i am transforming into an introvert or should i say weirdo like X**J** (asterix used to protect the identity of my fren) . Well i must say that i am not the person who would initiate a self-introduction or perhaps make frens so that makes everyting worse. Well.. sometimes i wish i had a reset button or sth and i would like to rewind my f**king life and maybe alter the way that i turn out to be but who doesnt wish for such a ting to exist.
Another problem is bothering me , has anyone of you ever thought of what if u had the power to get rid of someone u dislike? Would u abuse it and use it sparingly or perhaps the religious you thinks that we have no right to take away someone's life? Well i must admit that all along i have always been an angry teenager , angry adult , wadever. IF i had the power to get rid of pple whom i dislike , i would gladfully do it. This tot has been lingering around in my mind for a long time and somehow it becomes the foundation of my motivation in doing certain tings. I am a hypocrite , i put on a mask in front of pple but behind the mask is an ugly me , a me who is so filled with hatred , perhaps noone can understand the insanity devouring me bit by bit.
I hope i can continue to speak to my new-yet-old blog more often
Labels: Does not play well
